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I set out creating this blog thinking I had some knowledge of what biblical womanhood is. But now I am realizing that I myself need to get back to the basics and first truly understand what being a Christian means. Until recently, I have never truly trusted Christ or understood what He did on Calvary. I mean, I considered myself to be a Christian. I heard the gospel, I knew that it was true. Though I had heard the Word preached several times before, I had never really listened until God opened my heart and I actually believed what I was hearing. I felt exposed and knew I wasn't right with the Lord. I was baptized later on that same day I believe for the forgiveness of sins. But you know what? I didn't grow much after that because I didn't read the Word. I just "went to church". It wasn't until maybe 3 years later after I was baptized that I started to read the scriptures and God began to do great things in my life. He began to change everything about me.
And I believe now He's bringing me even closer to Him. I love this scripture in Acts 17:26-27,
"And He has made from one blood every nation of men
to dwell upon all the face for the earth
and has determined their pre-appointed times
and the boundaries of their dwellings;
so that they should seek the Lord
in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him,
though He is not far from each one of us;"
I like that word grope. It implies effort that is to be made on my part while searching for God. He truly has to be groped for diligently, even though He is not far from us. I did not use to to grope for God. God was very distant, and someone who I never talked about in my daily conversations. But now I am sensing, and in fact I know, that the Lord requires more than just a general acknowledgment of Him. I mean, He's my Creator. Honestly, even though this may seem like simple elementary level knowledge, I never really thought all that much about God being my Creator. Sure, I gave lip service to the fact, but I didn't meditate on it. I didn't allow myself to fully stop and think about it. And once I did, WOW! I got scared. I mean, if I have a Creator, He knows everything about me and I am 100% subject to Him in everything. EVERYTHING! He Himself has provided ways in which we humans ought to walk, and if we don't walk in those ways, we walk contrary to His perfect will. We don't know the right way, because it's not possible for us to know on our own...
"Oh Lord, I know the way of man is not in himself;
It is not in man who walks to direct his own steps"
Jeremiah 10:23
How true that is! I am very grateful to the Lord that He has helped to me grasp that fact and understand that it's not in me to know the proper way in which I should go. It's in Him, and Him alone. He is my source and I receive ALL things from Him. This is profound, because our culture nowadays is so engrossed with the thinking that we can plan, map out and choose our route without any need to consult or consider God and His ways. But I suppose that's the way it's always been. Though it seems so prevalent now, with our myriad of "choices" and "freedoms", many of which are in direct opposition to God and His word.
So I know that regardless of what I have been told, or what I have grown up to believe, it is ultimately God whom I am to know, worship and follow all my life. He's got that type of power and authority over me because He made me, and that's ALL I need to understand. I will be honest, this road can seem scary at times, but I am making a conscious effort to remember that my God is my Savior. He loved me, and gave Himself for me. For me. I have to get that ingrained in my mind, because I have rejected and neglected that truth for so long, it seems strange. He was willing to give up everything to save me from the punishment of my sins. Wow.
How great is our God!
~Narobi
